Betrayal Runs Deep
by tortallanrider
Summary: Love is whatever you can still betray. Betrayal can only happen if you love.—John le Carre TG R&R, rated for later content, genre may change. -DEAD STORY-
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

**Disclaimer: **You recognize it, it isn't mine, it belong to Tamora Pierce. I don't own it or the rights, I swear. The plot, however, does sort of belong to me.

Thayet _jian_ Wilima, formerly of Sarain, sat in the king's private study, planning her upcoming wedding to the Tortallan king, Jonathan IV of Conté.

"White would look so lovely," she sighed, admiring a sketch of a white wedding dress.

"Whatever you want," Jonathan responded, not even glancing up from the papers before him. Someone knocked on the door. "Come in!" Thayet sighed inwardly. Being betrothed to the king had its drawbacks—he was always being called away for something.

"Sorry to bother you," the person apologized, stepping in. Thayet brightened.

Sir Alanna the Lioness of Trebond and Olau was Jonathan's King's Champion. She was the first lady knight in several centuries, and had earned the title through eight years of masquerading as a boy. Alanna had also brought Thayet; Thayet's guard Buriram Tourakom; the late Shang Dragon, Liam Ironarm; and the famed Dominion Jewel home to Tortall a year previously. Recently back from time in the Great Southern Desert with her Bazhir tribe, the Bloody Hawk, twenty-year-old Alanna was betrothed to her long-time friend, and Jonathan's assistant spymaster, Baron George Cooper of Pirate's Swoop, Tortall's former King of Thieves.

"No trouble, Alanna," Jonathan replied. "What is it?"

"I need to borrow you for a moment," Alanna explained. She looked at Thayet. The knight's normally expressive violet eyes revealed nothing. "May I, Thayet?"

"Of course!" Thayet couldn't say no. What if it was important? Jonathan followed Alanna out while Thayet fell back against her chair. It seemed as if Alanna was _always_ calling Jon away. Even though the Lioness had assured Thayet several times that there was no romance between the King and his Champion, Thayet still wondered.

Jonathan had been one of the first to know Alanna's secret—he had been seventeen to Alanna's fourteen at the time. He had still chosen the small, temperamental redhead (then known as Alan) as his squire. Three years later, on Alanna's seventeenth birthday, the two had begun a passionate love affair that ground to a screeching halt when Jonathan proposed to a newly knighted Alanna. Thayet didn't know all the details, but she knew that both Jonathan and Alanna still bore scars from the words exchanged in their argument.

Jon and Alanna had been gone nearly ten minutes. Thayet rose and walked into the hall. She looked around and was drawn to a room where the door was ajar. She peered in to see Jonathan and Alanna locked in a deep kiss. Thayet fell against the wall. She knew they had a past, but she didn't know they had a present! Alanna had _promised_ they didn't have a present!

Thayet wondered if George knew. She assumed not. George was madly in love with his Lioness—he would be crushed to know she still had strong feelings for Jonathan. Thayet walked down the hall and down a flight of stairs. She headed to the rooms George and Alanna shared. George was bound to be there. The plaque outside read:

_Sir Alanna of Trebond and Olau, King's Champion_

_Baron George Cooper of Pirate's Swoop_

Thayet knocked. George's commoner voice called, "Come in!" She walked in and shut the door. "Thayet! Wha' brins ye 'ere?" He embraced his new friend. She sat on the windowsill across from where he sat on the bed.

"Do you know where Alanna is?" she asked, totally casually. George looked at her strangely.

"Of course. She lef' jus' a minute ago. She said she needed t' talk t' Jon," George replied. "Why?" Thayet held his eyes. He seemed to pick up on what was going on. "No. Ye don'…they aren'…"

Thayet nodded grimly. "I saw." George's shoulders slumped and shook as he put his head in his hands. Thayet moved to sit beside him, placing a comforting hand on his back. "Oh, George, I'm sorry…perhaps it would've been better if we _didn't_ know." George looked at her, hazel eyes swollen and rimmed with red.

"No. I knew it afore. I've suspect'd m' lass still loved 'im," George replied. "I fel' bad 'bout it. She tol' me she didn', so I believed 'er. Th' lass was ne'er a good liar. Th' only good lie she e'er told was 'bout her bein' a girl."

"So did I," Thayet admitted. "I believed her when she swore up and down they weren't together." Thayet, normally strong, crumpled into tears. "I asked her! I made sure before I accepted his proposal!" She slammed her hand on the bed. "She lied to me. I asked…" George held Thayet in his arms as they both cried for the loss of what they'd thought was love.

"She meant th' worl' t' me," George said. "An' she's hurt me again."

"I lost all my sense. I knew their past." Thayet sobbed, "How could I be so dumb?"

She looked up, and he down, so their swollen hazel eyes met.

"We were _both_ fools," George whispered. Brushing hair from Thayet's face. "But there's time to make it right." Thayet nodded.

"We know. There's no more lying. No more deceit." She looked at the ground. "I don't know how I'm going to move on, though." She shook her head. "I've never been this far gone in my life."

"It'll be 'ard, Thayet, no mistakin' tha'," George told her. "Yer friends betrayin' ye hurts, but yer love betrayin' ye hurts more'n tha'. We c'n 'elp each other." Thayet smiled at him.

"You make so much sense," she told him.

"Well, lass, its not th' firs' time m' Lioness's hurt me."

_**Author's Note- **I make no promises with this story._


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**Disclaimer: **The plot is mine. Everything else isn't.

**Apology: **I am making a formal apology to all my lovely readers who read "Hightree's Rose". I'm sorry that it turned out the way it did, because I had hopes for it, I really did. For whatever reason, I've been having trouble finishing stories. I'm finding that AJ is really starting to be the only thing I can write. Hopefully, this TG will work out a little bit better than my past two stories have. If it doesn't, maybe I'll keep doing fluffy AJ fics and maybe a few one-shots. Or maybe I'll start moving more into beta-ing.

**Little Recommendation: **if you haven't, go read **Glass of Lemonade** by **Mizshii**. Chapter Two is along the same lines as this story.

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Wiping her eyes, Thayet returned to the study. Jonathan sat at his desk, not a hair out of place. He smiled at her. "Hi. Where did you go?" He rose and kissed her. Thayet dodged it, so the kiss meant for her mouth met her cheek instead. Jonathan looked a bit puzzled as they both sat down again.

"The privy," she responded. Jonathan nodded, but he didn't look entirely convinced.

"Shall we get back to plans?" he asked, gesturing to the pile of sketches sitting on the corner of his desk. "You _do_ need to pick a dress."

"I don't know," Thayet said. "I'm tired."

"Tired?" Jonathan raised his eyebrow. "You had hours of sleep last night." Thayet blushed—of _course_ he would know that! She shared his bed, didn't she? "And I know you haven't been with Alanna or Buri today." He leaned forward. "Is something bothering you?"

"No," she replied quickly. "Nothing's bothering me."

"I don't believe you," he told her, sitting back. "You know you can tell me anything. I can see something's wrong." 

"I'm fine," she assured him with a smile. "Promise." Jonathan looked skeptical.

"All right then." He beckoned her closer. She rested her elbows on his desk. Jonathan leaned his face closer to hers. "You know I love you, right?"

"Of course." She kissed him briefly. "I'm going to go find Alanna."

"All right. She said she was heading down to the practice courts. See you at dinner?"

"Right." Thayet left and made her way to the practice courts. There was Alanna, chatting as Sir Gareth the Younger of Naxen and Sir Raoul of Goldenlake lazily dueled each other. Spring was changing into summer, and the day was hot. "Hello there," Thayet greeted. She walked over and stood next to Alanna. "Its hot, isn't it?"

"Of course it is," Gary replied. "Why do you think Raoul and I are only play fighting?" 

"You going to, Alanna?" Thayet wanted to know, nudging her friend lightly.

"I don't think so," Alanna replied, pulling her copper hair into a low horsetail. "Its too hot, even for me."

"Says the one who enjoys spending time in the desert," Raoul put in.

"Shut up. That's _winter_, dolt," Alanna told him. She smacked him upside the head, as he and Gary had come to stand near them.

"It will be nicer at the Swoop," Gary assured her. "The water helps the temperature."

"So I've heard," Alanna muttered.

"Something wrong?" Thayet asked innocently.

"No," Alanna replied. "I'm just not a big water person."

"No kidding," Raoul grumbled. Thayet laughed—Thayet, Buri, Raoul, and Liam had been subject to Alanna's seasickness on the trip back to Tortall.

"Shut up." Alanna slapped the big knight's arm.

"Are you looking to start something, _Lady _Alanna?" Raoul challenged, using his height advantage to tower over Alanna.

"Maybe," the King's Champion retorted. They were both smiling. "I've beat you before, and I'll do it again."

"I think you've gone soft," Raoul teased.

"Oh, you're in for it now, Goldenlake!" Alanna grabbed a practice sword and assumed the "guard" position. "Go for it, teddy bear." Raoul growled and swung. Alanna deftly blocked him.

Thayet shook her head. "I'm going now." As she walked away, she couldn't help but wonder if she'd really seen her fiancée and one of her closest friends kissing.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

_**Disclaimer:** you know what, I'm going to be honest with you. I really _am _Tamora Pierce. I've written all those books. _I wish_. No. I don't own anything except the plot. I don't have the _time_ to own the rest._

_**Author's Note-** sorry I'm so behind on updates. Midterms started last week, and I have been avoiding writing anything like the plague. Why? Because I am a terrible, awful, worthless piece of author filth. No, really. _

Thayet crawled into bed beside Jonathan that evening. He looked over at her, lying on her right side facing away from him, and put down his book. He blew out the candle and wrapped his muscular frame around her body, kissing her neck. Thayet felt herself melting and began to roll over to meet his mouth. Just then, the image of Jonathan and Alanna locked in an embrace jerked her mind away from her fiancée's lips.

"Jonathan," Thayet murmured.

"Mm?" he asked, kissing her collarbone. She rolled over and pressed her palms to his chest.

"Jonathan, not tonight," she told him, pushing away. Jonathan's blue eyes were bright in their questioning. "I'm tired," she lied. Jonathan rolled on to his back. It wasn't that he didn't like being refused—all right, maybe it was. Thayet winced. She knew that he still carried scars from being refused. _But Alanna apparently doesn't refuse him anymore,_ she found herself thinking bitterly.

"Good night," Jonathan said, and rolled away from her. Thayet watched his back and sighed, rolling onto her other side.

That night, she dreamed of spies.

_"Espionage, for the most part, involves finding a person who knows something or has something that you can induce them secretly to give to you. That almost always involves a betrayal of trust."—Aldrich Ames_

When Jonathan left to have his daily "meeting" with Alanna, Thayet made her way to George's chambers.

"I want you to spy on them," Thayet remarked from the doorway. George looked up from his paperwork.

"_What_?" he demanded. "You want me to _what_?"

"Spy on them," Thayet answered simply, shutting the door behind her. "You're the spymaster, are you not?"

"This doesn't sound like Thayet talkin'…" George said, his voice trailing off. He was obviously considering it.

"George, if we're worried that the two of them together, we should get evidence first." Thayet put her hand on his shoulder. "We both know that it isn't right to spy on them, but what they might be doing isn't right either. I don't want to accuse them of something that isn't happening, because that does us no good at all."

George nodded slowly. "I can't do the spyin' myself," he told the woman. "I'll have to get one of my men to do it."

"Someone you trust," Thayet reminded him. George rubbed his temples.

"I shouldn't be doing this," he said, more to himself than to her. "I should just trust my lass and wait it out." His shoulder began to shake as tears rolled down his cheeks. "But, gods, what if they really are together?"

"Now whose turn is it to act differently?" Thayet teased, wrapping her arms around her friend. "I know its wrong, but, George. How would you feel if she married you, and then you found out? Its better to learn the truth now."

George nodded. "You're right." He took her hands in his own. "You're a good friend, Thayet."

"Thank you," she said. She looked out his window. "I just hope Alanna and Jonathan will see it that way."

_**Author's Note-** you know what? Screw OOC. I like them being this way._


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

_**Disclaimer:** you recognize it? Well, unless I pulled it from another of my works, it belongs to the one and only Tamora Pierce, not me._

_**Author's Note-** from Alanna and Jon's POV_

Her wedding was in two weeks. A mere fourteen days between now and when she would officially become Lady Alanna of Pirate's Swoop and Olau, wife of Baron George Cooper. The only problem was that she was in bed with someone who was not George.

Two weeks precisely to her wedding—down to the hour—and she was lying in the bed of King Jonathan IV of Conté, her liege lord, and betrothed to the beautiful Thayet _jian_ Wilima.

This was not good.

"I can't believe I just did that," Alanna groaned, burying her face in Jonathan's strong, bare chest. "Kissing is one thing, but this? This is another."

"Are you saying you didn't enjoy it?" Jonathan asked, looking down at her with those dazzling sapphire eyes of his. He was laughing at her. Oh, how she hated him. Yet, at the same time, she loved him so much it almost hurt.

"No," she replied. "Just that it was wrong. We're both engaged, and here we are…" Alanna let her voice trail off. Jon knew what she was referring to. "If Thayet and George ever knew…" Jonathan brushed Alanna's mussed copper hair from her face.

"They won't," Jonathan promised. "We're being careful."

"They're perceptive, Jon. You think Thayet hasn't noticed you're always disappearing with me for long periods of time?" Alanna's violet eyes were full of emotion. "She's one of my best friends, so is George."

"Then what am I?" the king asked, eyes honest. Alanna searched for the word.

King? No, that was too obvious. And she treated his title more as a suggestion than an actual fact. Lover? No, that would make the relationship too solid. Friend? _Was_ he her friend?

"You're my best friend too," she answered finally. She swore. "No. I'm lying."

Jonathan kissed her tenderly. "You're so much more than my best friend," he whispered. "You're my lioness." Alanna smiled shyly. That was a word she never thought would describe her—shy. But she never thought she'd be betrothed, either. _Especially_ not to George.

Alanna groaned. "What am I going to do?" she asked the ceiling.

"Alanna, I love you," Jonathan blurted. She sat up and looked down on his (incredibly handsome) naked form.

"You _what_?" she demanded.

"I love you," he repeated.

"Oh, no." Alanna looked away. "Oh, gods, no. Jonathan, don't—" She squeezed her eyes shut. "Don't say that."

"Why not?" Jonathan sat up and wrapped his arms around her. "Alanna, I love you. I would ask you to marry me if I could." He groaned. "I have a duty to Thayet, but, gods, I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Alanna of Trebond and Olau." Alanna melted in to his embrace. Those were the words she had been longing to hear since Jonathan had first kissed her two weeks previously. But, George…

"But we can't," Alanna said, pulling out of his arms. "You have a duty to Thayet, as I have one to George. I can't—" she took a shaky breath, "I can't break his heart again."

"But you can break mine?" Jonathan looked at her with such intensity. He was right—if they left each other now, it would open still tender wounds. "And you can break your own?" Alanna looked away. No, she couldn't. But she couldn't break George's either.

"When did life get so complicated?" she asked out loud. Jonathan didn't answer. He knew who normally answered questions like that—Alanna's late magical cat, Faithful. At the thought of her friend, she crumpled into tears.

_"The betrayal of trust carries a heavy taboo."—Aldrich Ames_

George and Thayet were sitting in his rooms, laughing and talking, when they received word from George's man, who had been watching Jonathan and Alanna. George translated the code to Thayet, his face pale. "The royal bedchamber, clothes strewn…" He couldn't read anymore aloud, and Thayet couldn't hear it. She would've been all right if they had been kissing innocently. But…sleeping together? That she couldn't handle. She cried. George finally managed to read the last part of it to her, "He loves her. Spoke about marriage."

"No!" Thayet cried in disbelief. George let the paper fall as he nodded slowly. "But…oh, gods."

"We have to tell them," George told her. "They have to know that we know."

"I don't think _I_ want to know that I know," Thayet swallowed.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of these characters. I don't even technically OWN the plot, but I WILL come after you if you steal it._

George and Thayet knew that they couldn't wait long to tell their betrotheds that they knew the truth. They walked to Jonathan's study in total silence, faces damp. Thayet was hoping the redness around her eyes had gone down so neither Alanna or Jon would know that she had been crying. Glancing over at George, she saw that he looked perfectly normal. Thayet couldn't bring herself to say anything about it.

They knocked on the door. "Come in!" Jonathan called. When the two walked in, Alanna sat across from Jonathan's desk in one of the leather chairs. She looked perfectly at home in the room. Thayet felt a pang in her heart. "George!" Jonathan smiled. Alanna got to her feet and embraced her betrothed. George hugged her warmly, but Thayet could see he was dying inside, because she was too. Jonathan blew Thayet a kiss, which she received with the biggest smile she could manage, which wasn't very big. Alanna returned to her seat. George and Thayet took the two chairs as far from the king and his Champion as possible. It was clear that at least Alanna noticed this fact, as she frowned slightly.

"What's wrong?" Jonathan asked. "Thayet, you look as though you've been crying." Thayet swallowed hard.

"We know," she whispered.

"What was that?" Alanna leaned forward, concern on her face. "I couldn't really hear."

"We know," Thayet repeated, louder this time. "We know that you two are together." Alanna exchanged a panicked look with Jonathan.

"How long?" Jonathan croaked. He cleared his throat. "I mean, how long have you known?" He was now leaning forward on his desk, his lovely blue eyes filled with worry.

"Only a day or so," Thayet answered. "I saw you kissing."

"And I heard this morning about your…" George couldn't bring himself to finish. From their faces, it was clear that Alanna and Jonathan knew what he was referring to.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Thayet wanted to know, struggling to keep her composure as she toyed with the fabric of her skirt. She glanced up briefly. "Or did you not want us to know?"

"It started as a mistake," Alanna said. "It was an accident…"

"How do you 'accidentally' start having an affair with someone, Alanna?" George demanded. Thayet looked at him in awe. It was so out of his character to be angry with the woman he loved. Alanna was clearly stunned as well.

"I frankly don't think that's your business," she answered curtly. Thayet saw flashes of Alanna's infamous temper.

"I think it is lass," George told her. "You're my _betrothed_, and you're havin' an affair with another man!" George's voice raised in volume. Jonathan and Alanna instinctively guarded the room. If there was going to be shouting, it would be better that no one else heard it.

"George, please," Jonathan said. The words were pleading, but the king's tone was not. "Keep your voice down." George looked as if he'd like to tell Jon what he could do with his suggestion, but kept his mouth shut.

"What do you want to do?" Alanna asked quietly. Her eyes were locked on George. It was clear that she was still angry, but almost sad at the same time. George and Thayet exchanged a glance.

"We think that you two should be together," Thayet said.

"_What_?" the lovers exclaimed. "No way!" They gave each other almost disgusted looks. They'd tried that before, and it hadn't worked out.

"Think of the reputations," Jonathan half-moaned.

"Think of the reputations if it gets out you two are having an affair behind our backs," Thayet argued. Jonathan weighed the possibilities in his mind, and nodded.

"Alanna?" Jonathan asked softly, looking at his Champion. "Do you want to try again?"

"No!" she exclaimed, getting to her feet. "Jon, I love you, and I always will, but this is ridiculous! We've gone through this. I would make a terrible queen. And I _like_ being Champion. And I can't be both." She looked at George. "And I love George."

"Alanna, you goin' with Jon, its for the best," he told her.

"You don't mean that," she told him, shaking her head. "I can see it." George shook his head.

"Alanna, you know I love you, but I can't compete anymore," he said gently.

"You've been competing for years, why is this any different?" she snapped. "You're giving up now? That doesn't sound like the George Cooper I know."

"Well, havin' an affair behind her betrothed's back doesn't sound like the Alanna _I_ know." The hurt apparent on her face, Alanna left, slamming the door behind her.

"That comment wasn't like you," the king remarked coolly.

George was gazing at the door. "You're right," he said. "It wasn't. Should I go after her?"

"Are you serious about letting her go? That she and I should try again?" Jonathan asked quietly. Both Thayet and George nodded. "Then let me go."

_**Author's Note-** I freakin' loved this chapter. Midterms are OVER, and I have Chamber Choir auditions tomorrow, so wish me luck! _


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

**_Disclaimer:_ **_if I were _really_ Tamora Pierce, would I have the time to write all that I do? I think not._

_**Author's Note:** those auditions I mentioned before? Yeah…I have to wait until _Monday_ to have them. Joy, right?_

"Alanna!" Jonathan called, the door to his study slamming behind him. Alanna was rounding the corner. "Alanna!" He picked up his pace to a run and followed her. "_Alanna_!" She stopped dead in her tracks above the stairs.

"_What_?" she demanded, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Are you all right?" Jonathan asked. Alanna gave him a look. "Sorry. Guess not." They stood there, watching each other for a long moment. "Gods, Alanna!" Jonathan threw his arms up and dropped them against his sides. "What do you want from me?"

"Nothing," she answered. "I don't want anything. I _never_ wanted anything." She fell against the wall. "I don't know what I want anymore." She leaned her head back. "Goddess."

"Are you sure you're all right?" Jonathan asked, moving toward her. Alanna stuck her hand out.

"Don't come closer," she warned. 

"Why?" Jonathan questioned, taking another step. She opened her eyes and looked at him.

"Jon, we've _tried_ this, remember? We decided it wouldn't work. It was a mistake. There's time to fix it. And that's what I want to do," she told him. "I don't want to try again." She sighed. "We're both still hurt."

"When did you turn philosophical?" Jonathan asked her. "Alanna." He held her upper arms. "I love you," he whispered, searching her eyes. "And _I_ want to try again."

_"I have never known a more vulgar expression of betrayal and deceit."—Lucien Bouchard_

"Do you think we did the right thing?" Thayet asked nervously.

"I'm not sure," George answered honestly. "I feel bad, hurtin' her." Thayet nodded. The door opened, and Jonathan returned with Alanna close behind. George rose, a hopeful look in his eyes. Alanna shut the door and leaned against it, arms crossed over her chest and eyes watching the floor.

"Well?" Thayet asked, looking expectantly at Jon. "Did you make a decision?" Jonathan looked at the former princess, a little bit surprised at her words.

"Yes," he said. He glanced at Alanna. "We're going to try."

_**Author's Note-** yeah…a little OOC._


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7 

_**Disclaimer:** I don't own it. Sorry._

_**Author's Note-** I'm just going to flat out say it: there will be OOC parts. Don't like it? Don't read it. I don't like going OOC, but I will at times. Learn to deal with it. (Sorry if that sounds so mean…) Anyway. **Manicpony24** suggested I try a Terrier fic. Any other opinions? I was thinking of maybe trying an original fic…_

Alanna wandered back to her room, feeling a little bit lost. She wasn't sure how she should feel. Should she be relieved that she didn't have to go behind anyone's back anymore? Should she be sad that she wasn't marrying George soon? Should she be happy that she could be with Jon again? Or should she be mad that George and Thayet couldn't just let them forget it and move on? She was confused to say the least. When she reached the door to her chambers, she looked at the plaque outside, with both her name and George's on it. Her eyes filled with tears. They would have to change the plaque once she moved into the royal wing.

Yes, she was moving to the royal wing. She was King's Champion, so there was a room there for her, but she was also going to give whatever she had with Jonathan another try, so it just made life easier. Thayet would move to another room, its location yet undecided. Alanna sighed as she opened the creaky door for the last time. The sheer white curtains flapped as a cool September breeze blew through. Alanna shut the door and started to pack her things, attempting with little success to keep her composure. She heard the door open and close.

"Hello," she greeted, hoping it was George.

"Packing already?" Thayet asked, sounding more than a little surprised. Alanna looked at her (ex?) friend.

"Yes," Alanna answered. "I may as well get it over with before George comes back." Alanna continued to put things in her bags.

"You aren't moving very far," Thayet reminded the Lioness.

"I know." An uncomfortable silence stretched between them. "I'm sorry, Thayet," Alanna murmured.

"There's nothing to be sorry for," Thayet said, moving to help Alanna. She folded breeches and placed them in the bag, avoiding Alanna's eyes. "I should be the one sorry."

"No." Alanna shooed the woman's hands away. She preferred to pack for herself. "Jonathan and I are the ones wrong here. We're the ones who hurt you and George. I don't deserve for you to come in here and be my friend."

"Yes you do!" Thayet embraced Alanna. "Gods, Alanna, you're one of my best friends. Sure, I'm hurt, but I can't say that I didn't know you might still have feelings for it. I probably would've done the same thing." Alanna raised her eyebrow. "OK, maybe not. But, Alanna, really. I'm upset, yes. But upset enough to say that I can't be friends with you anymore? Not a chance." Thayet put her hands on the shorter woman's shoulders. "You and George will be friends again, in time." Alanna shrugged.

"I don't know," she said. "I'm almost afraid to be friends with him now."

"Why?" Thayet resumed helping her friend pack.

"Because look what happened when Jon and I tried to be friends," Alanna answered, going to gather more of her clothes.

"Alanna, honestly," Thayet said, "what are the chances of that happening again?"

"I don't really think I want to find out," the Lioness told her friend, closing her packs. "Anyway. Are you going to stand there chatting or are you going to help me move?"

"Gods, no need to get short," Thayet grumbled. Alanna eyed the woman.

"Short?" she asked. "This is hardly short. And, besides, I object to the term," Alanna sniffed.

"Oh, well, _excuse_ me, Sir Knight!" Thayet teased. Alanna glared good-naturedly. They left the room, each carrying some of Alanna's things.

"Ouch!" Alanna exclaimed as she ran into someone on the stairs and nearly fell down the flight. "Excuse you!" She looked up into George's hazel eyes. "Oh, George. Sorry." She stepped aside to let him through.

"No, it was my fault." He glanced at the bags. "Can I help with those?"

"No," Alanna replied quickly.

"Of course!" Thayet answered at the same time. The exchanged a look.

"I mean, there's no need for that, George, thank you," Alanna said. "We can handle them. _Right_, Thayet?" She eyed the former princess. Thayet shrugged.

"All right then." George continued on his way. Thayet glared at Alanna.

"You should've let him help!" she hissed. "You should still be friends!"

"I _told_ you," Alanna whispered. "I don't think it's a good idea!" Thayet rolled her eyes.

"Let's finish getting you moved," she said. "I still think you're crazy."

"I've been called _that_ before," Alanna muttered, following Thayet up the stairs.

_"Love is whatever you can still betray. Betrayal can only happen if you love."—John le Carre_

George entered the room that, just hours ago, he had shared with the love of his life, Alanna. The emptiness of the room hit him like a stonewall. Alanna's things were no longer strewn around. Her breeches were not lying in the middle of the floor. He opened the door to the closet and found only his clothes, not Alanna's few dresses. Looking around, he felt very, very alone. With a sigh, he closed the window. Alanna liked fresh air in the room, he couldn't have cared less. He shut the door and drew the curtains, wanting it to be as dark as possible. When the room was sufficiently dark, George sat down heavily on the bed and put his head in his hands. He felt like he should cry, but no tears rolled down his cheeks. He still loved her, and he hoped that, maybe, just maybe, she might still love him.

_**Author's Note- **I changed the summary to include the quote above, which I think sums up the story pretty much perfectly. Thinking of a title change—suggestions? _


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

_**Disclaimer: **Take out one of the SOTL books. Look at the copyright info. Do you see "tortallanrider" or "Erin" on there? No. The name is who owns this._

_**Dedication: **I have to dedicate this story to **.14karatgold.** because, upon seeing her profile, she put this as her favorite story, and that means a lot to me. I also appreciate all her fabulous reviews. So, thanks!  
_

A knock came on George's door. "Come in!" he called, getting to his feet. Alanna entered. "Oh, hello, Alanna."

"I thought I should give this back," she said, holding up her betrothal ring, a small amethyst set in white gold. "Since we're not betrothed anymore." George nodded slowly. Returning the ring seemed to make everything more final. He wasn't sure how to take that.

"Alanna," George whispered as she walked over to him. She looked up at him with her violet eyes.

"Yes?" she asked quietly. George kissed her softly. Alanna shook her head. "George, don't make this harder on me, please." The look in her eyes was so earnest that George felt his heart thud. She took his hand, pressing the cool ring into it. She folded his fingers around it and stood on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek. "One day, George, one day," she murmured before leaving. George placed his empty hand to where her lips had been and looked down at the ring. Inside, he'd had the words _To my Lioness _engraved. Just seeing those words brought tears to his eyes.

She wasn't his Lioness anymore.

_"He that has eyes to see and ears to hear may convince himself that no mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips; betrayal oozes out of him at every pore."—Sigmund Freud_

"Jon?" Thayet asked, rapping softly on the door to his study. "May I come in?"

"Of course," Jonathan answered. She walked in, shutting the door behind her. Jonathan sat at his desk, reading over some paperwork. "What do you need?" He put down the paper in his hands and looked at her. Thayet smiled—Jonathan was friendly, even though she wasn't his betrothed anymore.

"I wanted to give this back to you," she told him, holding up the yellow diamond ring he'd given her. Jonathan frowned. "What is it?" she asked.

"Nothing…I think you should keep it," he told her.

"_What_?" Thayet asked, shocked. "Why?"

"Well, your _name_ is in it, so I can't give it to anyone else, and I _gave_ it to you. Think of it as a gift," he explained. Thayet considered him for a moment.

"Are you feeling okay?" she wanted to know. "Because that's cra_z_y. It's a _betrothal_ ring, Jonathan. Not a birthday gift ring."

Jonathan shrugged. "So you want me to waste the effort of its maker because we're not betrothed anymore?" Thayet shook her head.

"You need to get more sleep, sire," she told him, placing the ring on his desk. "I won't keep it."

"You don't need to wear it on your _finger_," Jonathan argued. "You could put it on a chain around your neck." Thayet rolled her eyes.

"You're acting like Alanna, you know that?" she asked, taking the ring back and slipping it on her right ring finger.

The king grinned at her. "My Champion and I are a lot alike."

_"Betrayal... is my favorite subject."—Norman Jewison_

"Where's your ring?" Myles of Olau demanded of his adoptive daughter as she sat down in one of his chairs.

Alanna looked at him oddly. "You _noticed_?" she exclaimed.

"Of course," Myles answered. "I may be old, but I'm not _blind_!" Alanna sighed. "Now, where is it?"

"With George," Alanna told him.

"Why?" he probed.

"Because George and I aren't getting married," Alanna revealed slowly. Myles, who was courting George's mother Eleni, raised an eyebrow. "When did you become such a gossip, sir?"

"Its not gossip, I am simply interested in the affairs of my daughter," the shaggy knight answered. "Now, I want you to tell me the whole story." He poured them each a glass of brandy.

"There's no story to tell," Alanna lied. "Thayet and George said that Jon and I should try again."

"Try again?" Myles asked, looking more than a little surprised. "I was a witness to how that worked out the first time, and I hardly think that's a good idea."

"That's what I said, but they insisted," Alanna shrugged. She took a sip of the alcohol.

"You let others persuade you into something? That hardly sounds like the Alanna _I_ know," Myles commented, going to pour himself another glass.

"Stop it," Alanna commanded. "One is more than enough. We still have dinner to get through, you know." Myles was a recovering alcoholic, and Alanna never let him forget the "recovering" part. Myles gave her one of his Looks. "Don't you look at me like that. Eleni won't want to marry a drunk, now would she?" Myles looked long-suffering.

"How did I get saddled with an adopted daughter like you?" he asked.

Alanna rose and kissed the top of his head. "You chose me, remember? Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going back to my room to relax." She pointed at him. "And I'll know if you've had more to drink." He glared at her. She smiled.

_**Author's Note- **right…so…I'm kind of tired from all this typing._


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

_**Disclaimer: **__SOTL is owned by Tamora Pierce, I am merely a fan._

_**Disclaimer 2:**__ I haven't written this stuff since January or something. Please let me get back into it. I need to reread the books._

_**Author's Note-**__ Erin's back in action. If I was reading and reviewing your story, do me a favor and let me know what number the last chapter I reviewed was, and if you have anything new. I need to get caught back up._

That evening at dinner, Jonathan was thankful that only close friends sat with them. Dealing with the whole Court would've been a headache; because someone was bound to notice Thayet and George were no long with him and Alanna. In fact, he was concerned that Thayet and George might come down. He didn't really want to have to deal with anything awkward. Jonathan was one of those men who disliked awkward moments, as many did. He was fine in social settings, but awkward was not his forte.

When Alanna finally came down, he grinned and motioned for her to sit by him. She did, but he noticed that she did not smile back. "What's wrong?" he asked her quietly. She shrugged and picked at her meal. His brow furrowed. "Alanna." Showing almost maidenly shyness, she met his sapphire eyes with her own violet ones. She continued to chew. "I know something's wrong."

"Jonathan." She dropped her fork and gave him a serious look. "I just moved from my quarters into new ones. You think I won't be a _little_ upset?" Jon smiled at her. That sounded like his Alanna.

"Sorry," he said. "I was worried you were having second thoughts."

She glared at him. "If I were having second thoughts, I would've said something already. Do you know me at _all_, your majesty?" Now her eyes were twinkling in that way only Alanna's could. Jonathan smirked and continued to eat his meal.

Raoul looked around. "I missed something. What did I miss?" Gary raised his hand in agreement—he was chewing. Gary's wife Cythera patted his arm, and Buri patted Raoul's.

"Men miss everything," the women told the two large knights. Raoul frowned.

"They're my two best friends. I have a right to know," he insisted.

"An' my cuzzin!" Gary added, his mouth full of food.

"Swallow first, dear," Cythera reminded her husband in the way one might remind a young child.

"Where are George and Thayet?" Raoul asked. Jon and Alanna exchanged a look. Raoul noticed this. His hands hit the table, causing everything to shake. "No."

"Yes," Alanna shot back a bit teasingly.

"You're not getting married?" Raoul and Gary asked in shock. Alanna, hearing chatter around the table she didn't even attempt to follow, put her head down on the table, gently hitting her forehead against the wooden surface. Jonathan suppressed a laugh at Alanna's action.

"You know I can't understand what you're saying when you all talk at once," he announced loudly. The table fell silent. "Questions?"

"_Why_?" everyone asked together.

Alanna's head snapped up. "None of your business." Before she could say anything that might get her into trouble, Jonathan shoved a roll into her mouth and covered it with his hand. Glaring at him, Jonathan saw violet fire dance around her fingertips.

"However rudely my lovely Champion just put it," Jonathan began, "she's right. For now, we'll just say that there were cold feet and doubts. All right?" He met the eyes of each one of his close friends. "_All right_?" Before anyone answered, Alanna burned Jonathan's hand with her Gift. He winced, but left his hand where it was. "I asked a question, and would like a response."

"All right," the people chorused. Alanna bit down hard on the King's hand.

"_Ow_! Great Merciful Mother!" Jonathan sucked his hand where she had sunk in her teeth. "That _hurt_." With a smug smile on her face, Alanna ripped into her roll.

The rest of the table dissolved into laughter, all seemingly forgotten.

_**Author's Note:**__ sorry if that sucked. I need to go back and reread. Not to mention I had a 20 pound dog on my lap for the second half of that story. Dwight (my dog) says, "Please review!" _


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